Uncompromising

"I find your altruism admirable," man #1 said. "But you may have to compromise. I know you want to build U.S. Security and increase the capability of African partners - but you also have to look out for the bottom line. You're a business now. You may not be able to do exactly what you want in the way you want it. You may need to subordinate your ideas to someone like RAND or Booz Allen"
He looked at me in a way that he meant to be father-like. He meant to be helpful.
"I understand what you're saying," I told him. "But I assure you that my idealism is not drawn from naivete.  I am well aware of the risks I take by keeping ownership of my ideas and pushing the programs I think are important. I choose this way because, although I need to make money to survive, I am not driven by money. I am driven because I have ideas that work. I want to make the U.S. programs work."

Four hours later, on another, unrelated issue, I found myself on the phone with man #2 who was also advocating compromise.
"Once again, they've given me something I can't sign," I told him. "How can I agree to sign something that says I don't think they've done anything illegal or unethical when I believe they have done both?"
He answered: "That depends on how much you want this to be over. You have to ask yourself what you want to get out of this."
"I've held out on principle and truth when I fought the Dutch bastards. I held out - and didn't sign a lie when my job was at stake. Why on earth would I compromise now - for the sake of 8 weeks pay?"
He assumes it is money that matters to me. Not truth. This has never been the case for me. Truth will always matter more.

Some days, the world is full of judgment and sorrow. And there is no way to amend it. Some days, I can't make it feel any better.